seeing stars

these peregrine eyes
staring calmly, lightening the
deep haze from which i roll
they are syringes and syrups
from every wall and every window
anesthetizing, aesthetic
prodding me on.
these unbound eyes.
these soulful eyes.
i've never been so in love with a stranger.

this musculature
the pulsing heat of living,
a breathing home and celibate arms
they could drag me to the
precipice and i would do the rest
the light looks more like shadows
the shadows like light.
this simple body.
this dangerous body.
who is it that keeps me up at night?

you are not my enemy. you are also not my friend.
you are a chapter, blank and full.

sway

in the woods, trees are bending
narrow waters siphon tales
captured secrets, cities burned
some things cannot be reforged.
in the deep yellow of spring
the leaves are still falling
everything falls if given the chance
in the summer, you never really know
shallow blues all litter the street
swallowed news in the summer heat
and then, a year from now
dry reds and humming browns

but there is no foresight
just patterns in the dark.

wonderer

don't fight.

sudden slowdown and we're moving at
half-speed, half-mast
even the coroner looks scared this time

oh, ophelia. we meet again.

so every silent heartbeat
ranks on the richter scale these days
every saline plea puts me back a year
sometimes i get the sense of a
frictionless universe

punching bags were made for punching.
ironically.

the estranged life

absalom blew smoke in my face.

i woke up cold, sweaty and weak
where am i? gulf coast waves
wash guilt from the ground below
a cup of mile-high miracle slides my way
i push it away
no dreams in wonderland tonight.

the red queen kissed my hand.

there are lipstick stains on my collar
i wonder where i've been? ten-thousand
years is not enough, i'm searching
for words that you don't know

we're so, so late.

you taught me to read.
how could anything i say make sense?

piers and polyphony

i'm hoarding erasers, rubbing away the
days that didn't fit. questions
like needles sliding down my knees
stick to the floor at my feet
the rain on the roof sounds like
marbles on concrete
i feel like washing every headstone twice
before i drive and drive away

in this new world
there are no men, there are no ghosts
the peaceful empty cities
los angeles, you look so beautiful without your face

as i was

enjoy your day, you've earned it
coast to coast i always lose
my summer earnings are slipping through
since you left my side, i've only
just begun to feel awake and alone.
this fucking four-year dream is almost done.

every poem, every song, an altar to your name
i wish i could change the world
i'll change my name instead
birth certificates were made to be burned
bank accounts emptied
and minds put to waste
i hope you enjoy your fucking day.

sinking

he was arabian, they said.
cut-off shirts and leather eyes
and god, he tried to tone it down
somehow the heat of life
always caught him off-guard
the silvery blues kept dragging him
back with the tide.

he has no religion, no friends.
he has no parents.
no worries.
every night, his pores gasp
to take in the night, to let out the acid
some days he can't see a thing until midnight.
some days he sees too much
(but it's not a problem, just a fact
another wink or another thumbtack)
everyone always knows when he's mad
but not when he's not

on the day that he found out
trees were their normal green, for once.

sometimes spring is when you fall in.

this country, this hotter than hot
this world, these dreams
this sinking feeling keeps keeping me up all night
and every day is another spring.